Jel

Don’t be a Victim



Posted: Monday, November 01, 2010

by Jel
http://www.freewebs.com/jel1/index.htm

Self-pity and believing that you are a victim is a negative and useless waste of energy, kind of like guilt. However, there are many people out there who do nothing but sit around and feel sorry for themselves and constantly see themselves as a victim. Allowing yourself to be drawn into self-pity, negativity and seeing your self as a victim is draining and exhausting, not only for you, but for anyone who cares for you and wants to help you.

Keeping negative thoughts at bay after a breakup is a difficult process at the best of times. And it is equally difficult not to feel sorry for ourselves and feel as though the whole world is against us. Falling into victim like behaviour can happen without us even realizing it, given the circumstances and the feelings we are dealing with during a break up.

Show this side of your self to your ex lover and you can kiss your chances of getting back together goodbye. Your ex is not going to want to deal with someone who constantly feels they are victim.

Be aware of your thoughts and feelings of self doubt and try to catch them before they run wild and take over your way of thinking. Try to replace the negative with a positive. Easier said than done, I know, but you really need to focus on keeping a positive attitude, so that you can work on getting your self esteem back and re-build your life. Your goal is to become that loving, happy, caring person your ex fell in love with.

We all have choices when life knocks us down, we can get up and fight, or give in and go into self pity mode. Which choice do you think is going to benefit you more? The answer is the former statement. There is always hope, no matter how bleak your life looks at the moment. Reach out to people who care about you, go and see a counselor. When you are having a bad day, take some time out and do something nice for yourself, like a nice bubble bath or go see a movie. You are special and you deserve it. Keep reminding yourself that you are indeed special and your ex was the loser when he or she dumped you.

This process will obviously take time, there are no quick fixes. And a good start is that you are reading this article, which means you do want to make you life better and feel better about yourself, so get to it.

Copyright © 2007 Janelle Coulton

Fix Your Broken Heart And Discover The Powerful Hidden Secrets To Stop Thinking About Your Ex Once And For Good! Get Your Free Biggest Break up Mistakes' Mini-Course. Go to: WinBackLove
Jel is a writer of articles, essays and short stories. She also endorses and promotes other peoples written work, in the form of articles, E-Books and hard copy literature. Jel is an animal lover, avid reader, and loves to delve into controversial issues, she is passionate about writing and creating work that will encourage the reader to look into themselves, she also loves to make people laugh. Jel lives in Canberra with her partner, and her dog Brody and Spider her black cat. Jel is almost finished her BA Sociology at University and is would very much like to work as a social worker/counsellor. Jel currently counsels and advises people via email who are having problems in their relationships. She is currently working on a number of writing projects and hopes to have her first book published soon. Visit the links below:

http://www.freewebs.com/jelbaby

http://www.freewebs.com/jel1

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