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Who Should Pay on Dates? Contrary to what some men and women believe and given that society has changed. According to my research, most people think that the gentleman should pay. Controversial subject yes granted and people may say that this is old fashioned or unfair. It is true that equality amongst the sexes is leveling out however, there are many people in society who are still hold their old fashioned values close to their hearts. Therefore, this argument comes down to the following examples:

If a gentleman invites a lady to dinner, or lunch or a quick coffee, it is my belief that he should pay. Most gentlemen would probably be offended if the lady in question was to insist on paying, as he asked her out. A gentleman could feel threatened by his date paying her way, especially if he was the one who invited her out. A gentleman's intention is usually to treat his lady to a wonderful evening. Men enjoy this process and especially enjoy the smile on their lady's face, when a lady steps in and pays the bill, the thrill of the hunt and gather instinct is gone. Many people may ask: Aren't we beyond all this in 2006? This is so not true. Many of us still believe in the old fashioned values.

When a gentleman asks a lady out on a date, he is asking for the pleasure of her company. Many gentlemen would assume they are responsible for the bill at the end of the date. Some ladies say they feel uncomfortable with the gentleman paying for dinner, drinks, the movies etc, and might feel that they should contribute something. They may feel somewhat obligated. However, there is plenty of time to reciprocate down the road. The lady could invite her date to sample her home cooking or perhaps provide a picnic lunch for the two of them when they go on an outing. This could be a way for her to reciprocate.

In the larger scheme of things it is not really important who pays. It comes down to common courtesy and etiquette, many gentlemen would insist on treating their date. It is possible that many readers of this essay may not agree with what is written here, but they would be surprised to learn that many gentlemen were in agreement here. Face it ladies, if he's not willing to buy you lunch or a coffee, he isn't a gentleman and not worth dating in the first place.

Copyright 2006 Janelle Coulton